It Is A Good Rule In Life

Writing Is A Performance Art For Me. They're Very Closely Aligned, Writing And Performing. But I'm A Writer, Not A Performer.

It Is Only When They Go Wrong That Machines Remind You How Powerful They Are.

When You Cut It Up, Put The Pieces In Your Mouth And Swallowed Them, The British Hamburger Shaped Itself To The Bottom On Your Stomach Like Ballast, While Interacting With Your Gastric Juices To Form An Incipient Belch Of Enormous Potential, An Airship Which Had Been Inflated In A Garage. This Belch, When Silently Released, Would Cause People Standing Twenty Yards Away To Start Examining The Soles Of Their Shoes. The Vocalized Version Sounded Like A Bag Of Tools Thrown Into A Bog.

People Should Be Stopped From Writing Poetry. There's Far Too Much Of It. And If They're Any Good, They'll Go Ahead Anyways.

The British Hamburger Thus Symbolised, With Savage Neatness, The Country's Failure To Provide Its Ordinary People With Food Which Did Anything More For Them Than Sustain Life.