Is It Me Or Is President Bush's

Here's Some Exciting News - According To The New York Post, Both Al Gore And John Kerry Are Thinking Of Running For President In 2008. Gore And Kerry Again! Political Experts Say It's Too Early To Tell Who Would Lose Bigger!

John Kerry Has Promised To Take This Country Back From The Wealthy. Who Better Than The Guy Worth $700 Million To Take The Country Back? See, He Knows How The Wealthy Think. He Can Spy On Them At His Country Club, At His Place In Palm Beach, At His House In The Hamptons. He's Like A Mole For The Working Man.

A New Study Shows That American Students Are Becoming Less Proficient In Science, And If The Trend Continues, We Will Become A Nation That's Science And Chemistry Illiterate. And You Thought A Lot Of Meth Labs Are Blowing Up Now?

Iraq Began Destroying Those Missiles They Don't Have Over The Weekend. See, President Bush May Be The Smartest Military President In History. First, He Gets Iraq To Destroy All Of Their Own Weapons. Then He Declares War.

Things Have Really Changed Here In Hollywood. Used To Be People In This Town Couldn't Wait To Get An Envelope Full Of White Powder.