Barack Obama Now Says He Is Open

John Kerry Speaks French Fluently. Democrats Are Saying He's One In A Million. A War Hero Who Speaks French, Isn't It More Like One In A Trillion?

In Spite Of The Poor Economy, Almost 70 Percent Of Americans Occasionally Splurge On Luxury Items -- Like A Blanket On A Plane, Or A Peanut.

President Bush Demanded That Kerry Apologize. Can You Imagine That -- Bush Demanding An Apology For Someone Stumbling Over His Words? ... Kerry Should Have Tried The Bush Strategy: Say So Many Stupid Things, No One Cares Anymore.

Geraldo Has Returned To The States. See? I Told You Airline Security Was A Joke.

Enron's President, Ken Lay, Passed Away Last Week. So, I Guess Even God Lost Money On That Enron Deal. I Believe The Official Cause Of Death Was Listed As "karma." The Family Asked In Lieu Of Flowers, Please Send Some Elderly Retiree's Entire Life Savings.