Is A Hippopotamus A Hippopotamus Or Just

There's A Guy In The Audience With A Distinctive Laugh. I Hope That Guy Is Miked. The Only Problem With Having A Distinctive Laugh Is I Know Exactly When That Guy Isn't Laughing. "oh, Distinctive Laugh Doesn't Think That Joke Was Funny!"

I Had A Stick Of Carefree Gum, But It Didn't Work. I Felt Pretty Good While I Was Blowing That Bubble, But As Soon As The Gum Lost Its Flavor, I Was Back To Pondering My Mortality.

Come On 'long Prosperous Life!'

I Got An Ant Farm. Them Fellas Didn't Grow Anything. Hey, How About Some Celery? Plus, If I Tore Your Legs Off, You Would Look Like Snowmen.

You Know When You See An Advertisement For A Casino, And They Have A Picture Of A Guy Winning Money? That's False Advertising, Because That Happens The Least. That's Like If You're Advertising A Hamburger, They Could Show A Guy Choking. "this Is What Happened Once."