Ironically, To My Children, Bedtime Is A

How'd We Come Up With The Robe? Was Some Guy Just Like, 'hey, I've Got An Idea! Why Don't We Make A Coat Out Of A Towel? You Can Have A Little Belt That Goes Around. You Could Dunk The Belt In The Toilet! Have A Toilet Belt.'

You Ever Get A Postcard, You Get So Excited You Don't Even Read It! "hey I Got A - Who Cares."

You Ever Find Yourself Being Lazy For No Reason At All? Like, You Pick Up Your Mail, You Go In Your House, You Realize You Have A Letter For A Neighbor. You Ever Just Look At The Letter And Go "hm. Looks Like They're Never Getting This. It'll Take Too Much Energy To Go Back Outside. I'm Gonna Get That To Them Later On. Right Now I Gotta Watch Some 'love Connection.' They Got Some New Host On There."

Oh Great, Socks. You Know I'm Dying For Your Sins Right? Yeah, But Thanks For The Socks! They'll Go Great With My Sandals. What Am I, German?

I Don't Want To Be A Tv Star For The Sake Of Being On Tv. I Want To Have A Tv Show That's Based Around My Comedy.