I'm Nothing If Not An Optimist.

Ted Kennedy Is Endorsing John Kerry And I'm Wondering, Do You Really Want The Endorsement Of A Guy With A Bloody Mary Mustache?

Did You Hear What The Republicans Have Said About Hillary Clinton? They Say She's Too Angry To Be President. Hillary Clinton, Senator Hillary Clinton, Too Angry To Be President. When She Heard This, Hillary Said, 'oh Yeah? I'll Rip Your Throats Out, You Bastards.'

It's Interesting What Former Presidents Do When They Leave Office. Bush Is Now Working As A Motivational Speaker. And If You Want To Be Motivated, Who Better To Turn To Than The Guy Who Invaded The Wrong Country And Started A Depression.

There Are So Many Flavors Of Coke Now - Coke With Lemon, Coke With Vanilla, Coke With Lime, Cherry Coke, And They've Just Brought Out Another New Flavor - Coke With Pepsi.

Guess Who's Running For President? Jeb Bush. Jeb Was Governor Of Florida And He Speaks Fluent Spanish, Which Raises The Question: What Language Did His Brother Speak? What Was That?