I'm Not A Person Who Carries My

I Think There's One More Thing Perry Can Forget, Too: Being President.

They Had So Much Rain In New York That A Lot Of The Cabbies Had Their First Shower In Years.

There Is Now A $5 Million Dollar Bounty On Osama Bin Laden. Which Marks The First Time In History There Has Ever Been A Bounty On A Guy's Head Who Wears Bounty On His Head.

The Ceo Of The Cheesecake Factory Is Now Warning That Obamacare Will Be Very Costly. Hey, The Cheesecake Factory Is One Of The Reasons We Need Obamacare In The First Place.

Herman Cain Told A Group Of Occupy Wall Street Protesters To Go Home, Get A Job, And Get A Life. That's The Republican Version Of Hope And Change, Ladies And Gentlemen.