I'm Not A Movie Star And I

Failure Is A Great Teacher, And I Think When You Make Mistakes And You Recover From Them And You Treat Them As Valuable Learning Experiences, Then You've Got Something To Share.

I Don't See The Women As A Problem. The Women Are Doing All They Can Do. They're Heading Up Households; They're Single Parents; They're Breadwinners; They're The 'mamas,' They're The 'daddies,' They're The 'uncles.' They Take The Kids To School; They Take Them To Doctors, You Know? They Take Them To Games. I See It All The Time.

You Have Nothing If You're Texting A Guy In A Relationship. We Can Text Six Women A Minute. We Can Text It And Push 'reply All.' I Mean, Since We're Lying, We Might As Well Lie To Everybody.

I Have Seen Some Crazy People Do Some Crazy Things On My Variety Show. I Have To Stop And Ask Them A Lot Of The Time, Just How They Figured Out That They Could Do The Things That They Do, Some Of It Is Just Plain Freaky.

Being On A Comedy Tour Is Like Traveling With Family, Everyone Is All Having A Great Time... Then All Of A Sudden It Turns Sour. One Thing Gets Said Out Of Turn, And Everyone Is On Everyone's Last Nerve. After An Hour Of Silence, We All Start Laughing About It.