I'm Having A Nice Cold Pint And

Then There’s The Biggest Problem Of Them All – The Problem Of Being In An Audi Tt When You Are Not Called Angela. I Do Not Know Why It Can Be Driven By Only People Named Angela, But That’s A Fact And There’s Nothing We Can Do About It. If You Have A Tt And You Aren’t Called Angela, You Have The Wrong Car.

Like Many Men, I Can Never Find Anything That I'm Looking For, Even When I'm Actually Looking At It. In A Fridge, I Think Milk Is Actually Invisible To The Male Eye. And So, It Turns Out, Are Dirty Great Holes In The Fence.

Column Writing Is Like Gas - It Fills The Available Space.

The Only Person To Ever Look Good In The Back Of A 4-seater Convertible Was Adolf Hitler

[on The Bmw X3] If You Are Clinically Insane, By Which I Mean You Wake Up In The Morning And Think You Are An Onion, Here's Your Car.