I'm A Logic Monster, If Things Don't

President Bush Gave A Rousing Speech To The United Nations General Assembly. Afterward, In A Touching Show Of Support, Every Foreign Dignitary Shook Hands With The President And Smiled Warmly As He Mispronounced Their Names.

It's Not Vanity, Because If You Look Weird, It Will Distract From What Your Trying To Do. If You Look As Good As You Can, People Will Be Able To Pay Attention To What Your Actually Saying.

The Barrier Between Tv And Movies Has Come Down And Film Actors Are Willing To Do Tv And Vice Versa, Because They Just Want To Follow What's Interesting.

Sleep When Your Baby Sleeps. Everyone Knows This Classic Tip, But I Say Why Stop There? Scream When Your Baby Screams. Take Benadryl When Your Baby Takes Benadryl. And Walk Around Pantless When Your Baby Walks Around Pantless.

For Most Women, The Success Of Conservative Women Is Good For All Of Us, Unless You Believe In Evolution. Actually, I Take It Back. The Whole Thing Is A Disaster.