If You Want To Be A Writer,

If He Does Really Think That There Is No Distinction Between Virtue And Vice, Why, Sir, When He Leaves Our Houses Let Us Count Our Spoons.

They Who Most Loudly Clamour For Liberty Do Not Most Liberally Grant It.

In Bed We Laugh, In Bed We Cry, And Born In Bed, In Bed We Die; The Near Approach A Bed May Show Of Human Bliss To Human Woe.

Being Married To Those Sleepy-souled Women Is Just Like Playing At Cards For Nothing: No Passion Is Excited And The Time Is Filled Up. I Do Not, However, Envy A Fellow One Of Those Honeysuckle Wives For My Part, As They Are But Creepers At Best And Commonly Destroy The Tree They So Tenderly Cling About.

He Who Has Provoked The Shaft Of Wit, Cannot Complain That He Smarts From It.