If You Give People A Chance, They

If You Give People A Chance, They Shine.

Never Trust People Who've Only Got One Book.

I Like Salvador Dali And Rene Magritte. I Also Like The Scottish Artist John Byrne, Another Surrealist.

What Is It With Mcdonald's Staff Who Pretend They Don't Understand You Unless You Insert The 'mc' Before The Item You're Ordering? It Has To Be A Mcchicken Burger...a Chicken Burger Gets Blank Looks. Well, I'll Have A Mcstraw And Jam It Into Your Mceyes, You F**cking Mctosser!

Scottish-americans Tell You That If You Want To Identify Tartans, It's Easy - You Simply Look Under The Kilt, And If It's A Quarter-pounder, You Know It's A Mcdonald's.