If You Don't Vote, You're A Moron.

According To A New Study, Our Email Is Not As Safe As We Thought. How Do They Know This? They've Been Reading My Email.

Bp Ceo Tony Hayward Said Recently, 'no One Wants This Thing Over More Than I Do. I'd Like My Life Back.' Tony, I'm So Sorry You Had Your Summer Disrupted. I'd Buy You A Drink, But You'd Probably Spill That Too And Make Me Clean It Up.

By The Power Of Steven Wright's Beard!

The New Pope, Cardinal Jorge Mario Bergoglio, Is Now Pope Francis The 1st. Francis Was Not His First Choice For A Name. But The Vatican Wisely Talked Him Out Of Pope Boo Boo.

It's All About The Triumph Of Intellect And Romance Over Brute Force And Cynicism.