If Nothing Else, I'm Making A Movie

Bigger Than The Beatles? Well, How Many Grammys Did They Win? Exactly, None, Yet I Have One, And I've Never Even Released A Cd.

There's A Lot Of Gray Area In The Law. Who Can Say, Without A Doubt, That I Was In The Wrong?

Compared To My Talents, Whoopi Goldberg Is Like One Of Those Fake Plastic Buddhas You Get At Dollar Stores. I Mean Really, I Fail To See The Humor In An Overweight Negro Woman With Dreadlocks, No Eyebrows, And Is Named After A Childish Term For Flatulence.

I'm A Busy Guy; I Just Get A Lot Of People That Sound Like Me To Go Out And Visit Them. They Don't Know The Difference And, Let's Face It, They Aren't Going To Be Paying To See My Movies Anytime Soon.

I Don't Want To Blame It All On 9/11, But It Certainly Didn't Help Matters.