If I Wasn't A Comic Or Tv

When I'm Working, I'm Going To Avoid All Media. No Newspapers, No Magazines, No Movies, No Radio, No Tv. I'm Just Going To Do Creative Work.

I Like To Think Of My House As Nothing More Than A Glorified Console For My Television; The Ultimate Stereo Cabinet.

I Wanted To Do A Show Based On What My Life Would Be Like If I Had Never Become A Comedian.

When I Play Poker, I Don't Like Losing The Pot.

Boy, A Drive-through Liquor Store. God Bless America! A Place Where You Can Drive Through And Buy Whiskey, Beer... Just The Thing For That Drunk Driver Who's Constantly On The Go. Cant Stop Now! I've Got Places To Go, People To Hit!