If I’m At A Party Where I’m

If I Can Muster Up Any Allure In My Life, At This Stage, I Wouldn't Mind Doing That.

I, Like Most Women, I Dress For Other Women, I Think. If I Was Going To Dress For Men, I Think In General I Would Be Just Wearing, Like, A Fitted Black T-shirt And Tight Jeans Every Day.

The Chorus Of “jack And Diane” Is: Oh Yeah, Life Goes On, Long After The Thrill Of Living Is Gone. Are You Kidding Me? The Thrill Of Living Was High School? Come On, Mr. Cougar Mellencamp. Get A Life.

I Kind Of Killed It In College. You Know That Saying "big Fish In A Small Pond"? At Dartmouth College, I Was Freakin' Jaws In A Community Swimming Pool

Hey, A Disclaimer About Me: I’m Rude.