If A Tree Falls In The Woods,

I Don't Believe In The Concept Of Hell, But If I Did I Would Think Of It As Filled With People Who Were Cruel To Animals.

You Always Hear A Headline Like This, 'man Killed By Shark', You Never Hear It From The Other Perspective, 'man Swims In Shark Infested Waters, Forgets He's Shark Food'.

The Bluebird Of Happiness Long Absent From His Life, Ned Is Visited By The Chicken Of Depression.

Wait A Minute! This Is Grass! We've Been Eating Grass!

Of Course, Living In An All-glass House Has Its Disadvantages...but You Should See The Birds Smack It.