I Would Only Make A Movie That

In Our Racist, Sexist Society, Christmas Is The 8 Hours When We Stop Killing Each Other And Gratuitous Over Eating Is Encouraged So That The Starving And Other People In The World Can Die!

The First Time I Took Acid, I Made The Decision That I Would Stay In New York And Find An Independent Film Company To Get A Job With.

I Don't Make Crappy Movies. I Spend Two Or Three Years Making A Film. I Don't Take Myself Seriously, But I Take My Movies Very Seriously.

It's A Lonely World, Being Independent, And They Can Come Away With The Idea That If Lloyd Kaufman Can Make Movies With People Getting Their Heads Squashed, With Hard-bodied Lesbians, Women Masturbating With Pickles, Graphic Diarrhea, And Singing And Dancing Chicken Zombies - If He Can Do That For 40 Years And Put His Kids Through Yale, Columbia, And Duke - If That Idiot Can Do It, Anybody Can Do It.

Luckily, I've Never Been Offered A Directing Job That Was Lucrative. I've Never Heard, "here's $800,000 To Remake Sisters."