I Walk With God, And He Protects

You Have To Just Look At It Like Titanic: I Know The Ship Sinks, But This Is A Love Story

Storytelling Comes Naturally To Humans, But Since We Live In An Unnatural World, We Sometimes Need A Little Help Doing What We'd Naturally Do.

Everything I Do, In The Middle Of It, I Lose All Objectivity. The Business Of Comedy Is Kind Of Ridiculous In That Respect. Your Job Is To Have A Lot Of Fun In A Jar, Then Sell It. There's Something Inherently Illogical And Impossible About That, But That Being Said, This Is As Good As It Gets.

If Somebody's Cat Happens To Turn On The Tv, My Numbers Can Double. It's Almost Unrelated To What's Really Happening.

I Surround Myself With Loyalists And People That I Would Die For. I Just Would Rather Die Than Make Bad Stuff For People Because I'm A Terrible Dishwasher And A Terrible Lover And A Terrible Pet Owner.