I Used To Be Sceptic, But Not

I'm Sorry, Those Pictures From The Abu Ghraib. At First, They, Like Infuriated Me, I Was Sad. Then Like, A Couple Days Later, After They Cut The Guy's Head Off, They Didn't Seem Like Much. And Now, I Like To Trade Them With My Friends.

Guilt Is The Reason They Put The Articles In Playboy.

Bill Gates Is Just A Monocle And A Persian Cat Away From Being One Of The Bad Guys In A James Bond Movie.

Parenting Is The Easiest Job To Get - You Just Have To Screw Up Once And It's Yours.

There's No Doubt About It, Show Business Lures The People Who Didn't Get Enough Love, Attention, Or Approval Early In Life And Have Grown Up To Become Bottomless, Gaping Vessels Of Terrifying, Abject Need. Please Laugh.