I Think I Am A Good Role

Whenever I'm Hired To Do Appearances I Always Get To Take One Or Two Friends With Me. I'm Away So Much I'd Get Lonely If I Didn't. My Bbf Would Get To Go Jet-setting With Me To Amazing Parties Too, Like The Ones On P Diddy's Yacht. Apart From Me, He Throws The Best Parties – They're So A-list.

Wal-mart... Do They Like Make Walls There?

It's Called Paris, Not Hilton, Just Me, Because I Don't Want People To Think It's My Family's. It's Mine.

Yes, I've Kissed A Lot Of Guys. I Like To Kiss, But That's It. I Don't Go Home With Anyone. I Sleep With My Animals, Like My Baby Monkey, Brigitte Bardot.

If I Was A President I Want To Put An End To Only Large Financial Contributors, Lobbyists, Inside-the-beltway Fat Cats, And Corporate Bigwigs Getting To Sleep In The Lincoln Bedroom. I Will Keep That Room Open Only For People For Whom It Is Too Late To Drive After Attending One Of My Secret-underground-bunker-after-hours Parties.