I Think Anybody In Front Of A

Yeah, I Love Being Famous. It's Almost Like Being White, Y'know?

The Democrats Should Have An Empty Chair On Stage For The Entire Dnc, And When Anyone Asks Who It Belongs To, They Can Say Osama Bin Laden.

You Got A Gun, You Don't Have To Work Out.

If You're The President You Only Have Two Jobs: Peace And Money.

I Never Really Write The Jokes. I Just Sit Down Over A Week Or Two And Try To Figure Out What I Want To Talk About. Once I Narrow That Down, Then I Start Working On The Material, Like "how Do I Make This Stuff Funny?"