I Prefer Being Totally Sober Myself.

When I'm Dating Someone, I Have A List Called My 'oh No Nos.' If A Woman Commits A Oh No No, It Can End The Relationship. Not Loving '90s R&b Music Is #3 On The Oh No Nos List. Girl Don't Even Know Who Ginuwine Is.

No One's Trying To Get With Jugglers.

Acting Is A Plum Gig, And Then Animation Is An Even More Plum Gig.

Writing Your Own Jokes, You Just Kind Of Keep Working On Something Until You Think It Might Work, And Then You Try It Out And Hope For The Best.

She Broke Up With Me. Didn't Really Tell Me Why. Luckily When You're The Guy, You Can Just Tell People She's Crazy. 'hey, Tom, I Heard You And Lucy Broke Up.' 'yeah, Man. Turns Out, She's Crazy.' That's What They Always Do On Entourage.