I Never Drank Anything Stronger Than Beer

A Thing Worth Having Is A Thing Worth Cheating For.

I Never Drink Water. I'm Afraid It Will Become Habit-forming.

Here Is My Best Advice On The Matter Of Deductibles: Just Count Off On Your Fingers All The Items That You Suspect Might Be Deductible - And Then Forget Them, Because They Aren't.

Variant: I Was Driven To Drink By A Woman. I Am Forever Grateful, Yet I Never Had The Good Manners To Thank Her.

Marry An Outdoors Woman. Then If You Throw Her Out Into The Yard On A Cold Night, She Can Still Survive.