I Never Cheated On My Wife. I

I Think My Ex-girlfriend Has Weekly Lessons With The Devil On How To Be More Evil. I Don't Know What She Charges Him.

I Go To Pick Up A Girl In A Bar. I Say Will You Go Home With Me? She Says I Don't Know, Do You Have Cable? I Say No, But The Rope Should Work Just Fine.

I Never Cheated On My Wife. I Took Seriously Those Vows Of Celibacy.

The Only Work I Ever Turned Down Was A Cable Programme Called Diving For Excrement.

I Ran Five Miles Today. Then, Finally, I Said, 'here, Lady...take Your Purse.'