I Need A Woman To Have A

I'm A Sensitive Guy. If You Are A Woman And You're In Any Kind Of Emotional Duress And You Write A Song About It, I'll Buy You Album.

I've Been Accused Of Not Really Paying Attention To A Sentence Unless My Name Comes Up In It Twice.

I Have Never Really Lived With Anyone In My Adult Years. I Just Read My Sports Ticker. And 50 Shades Of Grey.

I Never Really Thought Of Myself As A Physical Comedian. But When I Was A Kid, I Used To, You Know, Pretend To Trip Over Things To Make Girls Laugh In School And Stuff Like That. So I Kind Of Learned How To Fall Without Hurting Yourself.

They Say That Women Like A Man Who Can Make Them Laugh, And I Find That If You Can Make A Woman Laugh On The First And Second Dates, Then You're Doing Well.