I Love Comedy. God Has Given Me

I Used To Say That Whenever People Heard My Southern Accent, They Always Wanted To Deduct 100 Iq Points.

That's Just Something Instinctual Within Men. We Always Feel Like We've Got To Protect Our Stuff. Even If It's Not Worth Protecting, We Want To Protect It. You Ever Seen People Who Have Like A Piece Of Crap Pinto With A Club On The Steering Wheel. Somebody Breaks The Window, Steals The Club, Leaves The Pinto In A Pile Of Glass.

You Might Be A Redneck If Taking A Dip Has Nothing To Do With Water.

You May Be A Redneck If . . . You Think You Are An Entrepreneur Because Of The "dirt For Sale" Sign In The Front Yard.

You Might Be A Redneck If When You Leave Your House, You Are Followed By Federal Agents Of The Bureau Of Alcohol Tobacco And Firearms, And The Only Thing You Worry About Is If You Can Lose Them Or Not.