I Like To Smoke A Pipe, Because

Every Book Is A Children's Book If The Kid Can Read!

I Hate Dreaming Because When You Want To Sleep, You Want To Sleep. Dreaming Is Work. Next Thing You Know, I Have To Build A Go-cart With My Ex-landlord.

I Would Like To Go Fishing And Catch A Fish Stick. That Would Be Convenient. I Could Easily Get A Job At Mrs. Paul's.

The Commercial For Diet Dr. Pepper Says It Tastes Just Like Regular Dr. Pepper. Well, Then They Screwed Up!

I Hate Arrows. They Try To Tell Me Which Direction To Go. It's Like "i Ain't Going That Way, Line With Two Thirds Of A Triangle On The End!"