I Like Feeling Like An Ox At

You Don't Feel As Self-conscious If Your Clothes Fit.

When Men I Have Dated Over The Years Whined About, ‘oh, You Make No Time For Me’ – See Ya! I Just Dumped Them. I Don’t Need That Pressure In My Life.

You Do It With Your Own Two Hands, So There's A Sense Of Pride. You Really Do Forget All Our Problems, Because You're Focusing On The Food.

I Felt I'd Earned The Good Housekeeping Seal When I Designed An Oval-shaped Spaghetti Pot, Because Spaghetti Is Long.

When You Really Want To Show Some Love, Keep The Flowers And Say It With Spaghetti.