I Know If Mama Ain't Happy, Ain't

I've Gotten To The Point I Won't Even Watch The 11 O'clock News. You Just Walk Away From It Thinking How Bad Everything Is.

Did You Know Babies Are Nauseated By The Smell Of A Clean Shirt?

I Refuse To This Day To Do E-mail Because Everybody I Know That Does It, It Takes Another Two Or Three Hours A Day. I Don't Want To Give Two Or Three More Hours Away.

You Might Be A Redneck If Your Momma Gives You Tips On How To Sneak Booze Into Sporting Events.

You Might Be A Redneck If You Move Your Refrigerator And The Grass Underneath It Has Turned Yellow.