I Have What I Call A-list Moments,

The Thing That Cracks Me Up Is How These Reality Characters Start Out Thrilled And Excited Just To Be On Television, And How They Move To Thinking They Are As Big As The Friends.

When I See You, I Smile. When I Touch You, I Feel You. When I Kiss You, I Love You!

Do You Remember A Little Phenom Called Step Aerobics? If You Do, Then You Know How Crazy It Was To Take Two Ninety-minute Classes In A Row. It’s Incredible That I Didn’t Die From A Blunt Injury To The Back Of My Head From Slipping On My Own Pool Of Sweat.

Most People Unfamiliar With The Men In A New Town Might Search For Love Until They Find It. I Picked Out Some Guy On My Second Day In La, Who Worked At The Local Bicycle Shop, And Handed My Virginity To Him. “you Can Fill A Tire? Sounds Good To Me. Let's Call It A Date.” Needless To Say He Wasn't Mr. Right.

I Hate It, It Is Tedious... When I Write For My Act, It Is Very Improvisational, I Write Bullet Points, I Cannot Sit In Front Of A Computer; That Is Not My Style.