I Have To Do A Show Which

Donald Trump Showed His Birth Certificate To Reporters. Who Cares About His Birth Certificate? I Want To Know If That Thing On His Head Has Had Its Vaccinations.

Anyone Who's Just Driven 90 Yards Against Huge Men Trying To Kill Them Has Earned The Right To Do Jazz Hands.

Rush Limbaugh Says If The Health Care Bill Passes, He Will Leave The Country. The Democrats Are Upset, Because If They Knew That, They Would Have Passed The Bill Years Ago.

I Became A Terrible Drunk Or Alcoholic - Or A Good One Depending On Your Point Of View.

The Three Drunkest Cities In America: Fresno, Riverside, And Whatever Mel Gibson Is Driving Through.