I Don't Want To Wake Up With

My Girlfriend Is Jewish. But It's Easier To Buy Her A Christmas Present And Then Break It Into 8 Pieces.

I Can't Talk Politics With My Cousin Because He's Such A Hypocrite. He's Against The Death Penalty And He Hanged Himself.

Ellen Barkin, Your Upcoming Tv Show ‘the New Normal’ Premiers On September 11th. September 11th, That Sounds About Right. Every Clip I’ve Seen Feels Like I’m Watching A Third Tower Collapse.

My First Time On Stage Was The Class "graduation" At The Comedy Store. It Was Awesome. Everything Got Huge Laughs And I Just Thought I Knew How To Do Comedy.

Katey Sagal, You Are An Incredible Actress. You Worked On ‘married With Children,’ The Show That Changed Comedy, ‘sons Of Anarchy,’ The Show That Took Comedy To A Whole New Level And ‘8 Simple Rules,’ The Show That Killed John Ritter.