I Don't Think It's Going To Be

I Grew Up On Network Sitcoms. If Those Are Gone When I'm 65 Years Old, I Would Never Forgive Myself For Not Stepping Up To That Plate, As Often As Possible. I'm Already Bummed Out That Dvds Are Dying Off Because, In My 20s, Those Were A Huge Thing.

I Really Like Performing For People.

Everything I Do, In The Middle Of It, I Lose All Objectivity. The Business Of Comedy Is Kind Of Ridiculous In That Respect. Your Job Is To Have A Lot Of Fun In A Jar, Then Sell It. There's Something Inherently Illogical And Impossible About That, But That Being Said, This Is As Good As It Gets.

My Cat Brought Me A Toy. I Thanked Her And Threw It. She Sat There Gave Me A Look That Made Me Realize People And Dogs Are The Crazy Ones.

'i Want To Touch People But If I Touch Them In Real Life They'll Slap Me.' That's What Writing Isit's A Gross Person Getting A Hug.