I Don't Return Fruit. Fruit's A Gamble.

Folks Who Go Through The Tabloids Ought To Have To Be Lied To.

All Magic Is 'here’s A Quarter, Now It’s Gone. You’re A Jerk. Now It’s Back. You’re An Idiot. Show’s Over.'

Taking In A Baseball Game On Tv Is Also A Big Treat.

I Can't Go To A Bad Movie By Myself. What, Am I Gonna Make Sarcastic Remarks To Strangers?

These Pretzels Are Making Me Thirsty!