I Don't Know Enough To Be Incompetent.

Standard Mathematics Has Recently Been Rendered Obsolete By The Discovery That For Years We Have Been Writing The Numeral Five Backward. This Has Led To Reevaluation Of Counting As A Method Of Getting From One To Ten. Students Are Taught Advanced Concepts Of Boolean Algebra, And Formerly Unsolvable Equations Are Dealt With By Threats Of Reprisals.

All People Know The Same Truth. Our Lives Consist Of How We Choose To Distort It.

What If Everything Is An Illusion And Nothing Exists? In That Case, I Definitely Overpaid For My Carpet.

For The First Year Of Marriage I Had Basically A Bad Attitude. I Tended To Place My Wife Underneath A Pedestal.

Don't Knock Masturbation. It's Sex With Someone I Love.