I Did Auditions At A Club Called

My Mom Said She Learned How To Swim When Someone Took Her Out In The Lake And Threw Her Off The Boat. I Said, 'mom, They Weren't Trying To Teach You How To Swim.'

I Have A Very Silly Sense Of Humor. I've Never Laughed Harder In My Entire Life Than Seeing Someone With Toilet Paper Stuck On The Bottom Of Their Shoe.

My Mom Is One Of Those Really Angry Moms Who Gets Mad At Absolutely Everything. Once When I Was A Little Kid, I Accidentally Knocked A Flintstones Glass Off The Kitchen Table. She Said, 'well, Dammit, We Can't Have Nice Things.'

You Know, In Politics When You Come In Third, It's A Win.

I Only Do Two Things In My Life, And That's Take Care Of My Kids And Work. Fortunately, These Are My Favorite Things To Do, So It Works Out.