I Can't Eat Spaghetti. There's Too Many

If Carrots Got You Drunk, Rabbits Would Be Messed-up.

I Mumble A Lot When Im Off Stage, So A Lot Of Times When Im With A Friend I'll Say Something And He'll Be Like What, And I'll Say It Again And He'll Be Like What, And I'll Say It Again And He'll Still Be Like What, So Now He's Got Me Yellin. Man That Tree Is Far Away

There Was A Product On Late Night Tv That You Could Attach To Your Garden Hose - "you Can Water Your Hard-to-reach Plants With This." Who Would Make Their Plants Hard To Reach? That Seems So Very Mean. I Know You Need Water, But I'm Going To Make You Hard To Reach. "think Like A Cactus!"

Once I Saw A Duck Walking Down The Street So I Went Into Subway And Ordered Two Pieces Of Bread, And They Informed Me That They Could Not Do That, Like There Was Some Speical Rule At Subway That Two Pieces Of Bread Weren't Allowed To Touch. So The Woman Asked Me What I Wanted On The Sandwich And I Said I Do Not Care, It Is For A Duck, And She Was Like Oh Then It's Free. I Was Not Aware That Ducks Eat For Free At Subway. It's Like Give Me A Chicken Fajita Sub, But Don't Worry About Ringing It Up, It Is For A Duck.

My Girlfriend Works At Hooters. In The Kitchen.