I Became A Yankees Fan For A

Joe Biden Went To Brazil In An Effort To Try And Repair America's Relationship With Their Government. Biden Said, 'it's Great To Be Here In The Amazon. I've Always Wanted To See Where All The Books Come From.'

Vladimir Putin Bribed A Soccer Official With A Picasso Painting So He Would Support Russia's Bid To Host The 2018 World Cup. Putin Was Like, 'it Wasn't Picasso, Just Picture Of What His Face Would Look Like If He Said No.' (nose Over Here, Eye Up Here, Ear In Forehead.)

If People Want To See You, They'll Find You. If They Don't See You On Tv, They'll Find You On The Internet.

There Are Reports That President Obama And His Family May Move To New York City After His Term Is Over. Unfortunately, The City Is So Expensive, He's Looking For Another Ex-president To Be Roommates With.

Arizona Just Became The 15th State To Approve Medical Marijuana. So I Give It Three Days Before They Stop Caring About The Whole Immigration Thing.