I Am One Of The Lucky People

I Can Empathize With President [george Bush]. I Know What It Feels Like Having A Young Guy Waiting Around For You To Keel Over.

When The Public Starts Classifying You As Thoughtful, Someone Given To Serious Issues, You Find Yourself Declassified As A Humorist.

May You Have The Income Of A Republican And The Sex Life Of A Democrat!

Maybe We Should Hold The Next [olympic] Games In Afghanistan And Hope The Soviets Pull Out Of That One Too.

Egyptian President Sadat Had A Belly Dancer Entertain President Nixon At A State Dinner. Mr. Nixon Was Really Impressed. He Hadn't Seen Contortions Like That Since Rose Mary Woods.