Having A 2 Year Old Is Like

Did You Ever Notice, When You Are Sitting At A Red Light, That When The Person In Front Of You Pulls Up A Couple Of Inches, You Are Compelled To Move Up Too? Do We Really Think We Are Making Progress Toward Our Destination? "whew, I Thought We Would Be Late, But Now That I Am Nine Inches Closer, I Can Stop For Coffee And A Danish!"

All Magic Is 'here’s A Quarter, Now It’s Gone. You’re A Jerk. Now It’s Back. You’re An Idiot. Show’s Over.'

I Love The Day Date. No Wine, No Shower.

I Will Never Understand Why They Cook On Tv. I Can't Smell It. Can't Eat It. Can't Taste It. The End Of The Show They Hold It Up To The Camera, 'well, Here It Is. You Can't Have Any. Thanks For Watching. Goodbye.'

Magazines Are Another Medium I Love, Because 95% Is Simply Based On 'how The Hell Are We Going To Fill All This Blank Space?