If I Had A Hammer, There'd Be

Don't Buy One Of Those Baby Intercoms. Babies Pretend To Be Dead. They're Bastards, And They Do It On Purpose.

When I Was 12, We Went From Glasgow To Aberdeen On A School Trip. It Was Called Fresh Air Fortnight.

People Die All The Time. It's Just That You're Not Around.

The More You Know The Less The Better.

American Sex Shops Are The Most Bizarre. They Sell These Inflatable Dolls, But They Also Sell Just The Head -- Supposedly For People To Drive Along The Highway With.