Before They Invented Drawing Boards, What Did

They Say If You Outlaw Guns, Only Outlaws Will Have Guns. Well, Those Are Precisely The People Who Need Them!

And What Can We Do To Silence These Christian Athletes Who Thank Jesus Whenever They Win, Never Mention His Name When They Lose? Not A Word. You Never Hear Them Say "jesus Made Me Drop The Ball." "the Good Lord Tripped Me Up Behind The Line Of Scrimmage." According To These Guys Jesus Is Undefeated, Meanwhile These Assholes Are In Last Place. Must Be Another One Of Those "miracles."

Things I Wonder About The Fbi's List Of The "ten Most Wanted" Criminals: When They Catch A Guy And He Comes Off The List, Does Number Eleven Automatically Move Up? And Does He See It As A Promotion? Does He Call His Criminal Friends And Say, "i Made It, Bruno. I'm Finally On The List"?

When Thomas Edison Worked Late Into The Night On The Electric Light, He Had To Do It By Gas Lamp Or Candle. I'm Sure It Made The Work Seem That Much More Urgent.

When People Asked Me, "do You Get High To Go Onstage?" I Could Never Understand The Question. I Mean, I'd Been High Since Eight That Morning. Going Onstage Had Nothing To Do With It.