As A Foreigner In London, I Like

People Ask Me, 'have You Ever Considered Doing Stand-up?' To Me It Would Be Less Offensive If Someone Asked Me, 'have You Ever Considered Dental Implants?'

You Can't Brace Yourself For Famine If You've Never Known Hunger.

I Can't Promise I'll Never Kill Anyone Again," He Once Said, Strapping A Refrigerator To His Back. "it's Unrealistic To Live Your Life Within Such Strict Parameters

No One Reads To Hear Someone Complain About The Weather Or How Poorly Their Children Are Behaving. You Have To Give The Readers A Reason To Turn The Page. As A Writer You Have To Invite Someone To Turn The Page. And That Is A Skill You Have To Refine. That Is Why You Have To Read. You Have To Read To Learn What It Is That Makes People Turn The Page.

It Is Funny The Things That Run Through Your Mind When You're Sitting In Your Underpants In Front Of A Pair Of Strangers.