Any Task Can Be Completed In Only

Law Number Xx: In Any Given Year, Congress Will Appropriate The Amount Of Funding Approved The Prior Year Plus Three-fourths Of Whatever Change The Administration Requests, Minus 4-percent Tax.

If A Sufficient Number Of Management Layers Are Superimposed On Top Of Each Other, It Can Be Assured That Disaster Is Not Left To Chance.

If The Earth Could Be Made To Rotate Twice As Fast, Managers Would Get Twice As Much Done. If The Earth Could Be Made To Rotate Twenty Times As Fast, Everyone Else Would Get Twice As Much Done Since All The Managers Would Fly Off.

Law Number Xvi: In The Year 2054, The Entire Defense Budget Will Purchase Just One Aircraft. This Aircraft Will Have To Be Shared By The Air Force And Navy 3-1/2 Days Each Per Week Except For Leap Year, When It Will Be Made Available To The Marines For The Extra Day.

Law Number Xxxvi: The Thickness Of The Proposal Required To Win A Multimillion Dollar Contract Is About One Millimeter Per Million Dollars. If All The Proposals Conforming To This Standard Were Piled On Top Of Each Other At The Bottom Of The Grand Canyon It Would Probably Be A Good Idea.