All These Jokes Have Been Pre-approved As

If I'm Out To Dinner With A Group Of Friends, And Somebody Offers To Pay For The Check, I Immediately Reach For My Wallet. Inside Is A Note That Says, "say Thanks!"

A Severed Foot Is The Ultimate Stocking Stuffer.

I Like To Hold The Microphone Cord Like This, I Pinch It Together, Then I Let It Go, Then You Hear A Whole Bunch Of Jokes At Once.

I Have A "do Not Disturb" Sign On My Hotel Door. It's Time To Go To "don't Disturb". It's Been "do Not" For Too Long. We Should Embrace The Contraction.

All These Jokes Have Been Pre-approved As Funny By Me.