All Of Us Invent Ourselves. Some Of

I'm Not Gonna Become Ann Bancroft Or Meryl Streep And Have All The Burden That Being A "serious Actress" Entails.

Some Years I'm The Coolest Thing That Ever Happened, And Then The Next Year Everyone's So Over Me, And I'm Just So Past My Sell Date.

Sometimes I Don't Tell The Truth, Which Is Telling The Truth About Not Telling The Truth. I Think People Don't Tell The Truth When They're Afraid That Something Bad's Going To Happen If They Tell The Truth. I Say Things All The Time That I Could Really Get Into Trouble For, But They Kind Of Blow Over.

You've Probably Noticed Already That I'm Dressed Like A Grown-up... I Apologize To The Academy, And I Promise That I Will Never Do It Again.

Gay Guys Like A Certain Kind Of Woman. They Like A Flamboyant Woman That's Broken. They Like A Balls-to-the-wall Woman, Motherly But Not; Sexual But Not. Gay Guys Are Like This: They Either Love You Or They Don't Even Know You're On The Planet. Once You Have Them, You Have Them.