Alcohol Gives You Infinite Patience For Stupidity.

Real Success Is Not On The Stage, But Off The Stage As A Human Being, And How You Get Along With Your Fellow Man.

What Have I Got? No Looks, No Money, No Education. Just Talent.

With An Ocean Between You And Your European Friends, You Have To Keep Them In Your Heart.

When Liza Minelli Was A Child, She Used To Sit On My Lap And Call Me Uncle Sammy.

My Home Has Always Been Show Business.