Agnostics Are Just Atheists Without Balls.

It's Official. Highway Patrolmen Are Not Susceptible To The Jedi Mind Trick.

I Love The Earth. If You Ask Me It's The Greatest Planet In The World.

I'm Not Here To Affect You Politically Or Socially. I'm Here To Make You Laugh. I Use The News As The Palette For My Jokes.

Folks, I Don't Trust Children. They're Here To Replace Us.

You Should Spend More Time With Your Families; Write That Novel You've Always Wanted To Write. You Know, The One About The Fearless Reporter Who Stands Up To The Administration. You Know - Fiction.