After I Got My First Laugh On

I've Been Accused Of Not Really Paying Attention To A Sentence Unless My Name Comes Up In It Twice.

I Used To Be A Real Prince Charming If I Went On A Date With A Girl. But Then I'd Get To Where I Was Likely To Have A Stroke From The Stress Of Keeping Up My Act. I've Since Learned The Key To A Good Date Is To Pay Attention On Her.

To Me, Writing Is Remembering Something Funny That Happened, Or Maybe Something I Said Seven Years Ago.

I Never Really Thought Of Myself As A Physical Comedian. But When I Was A Kid, I Used To, You Know, Pretend To Trip Over Things To Make Girls Laugh In School And Stuff Like That. So I Kind Of Learned How To Fall Without Hurting Yourself.

If There's A Silence In A Room I'll Try To Fill It As Soon As Humanly Possible.